To TTC? Or Not?

I keep thinking that I really should change the name of this blog. It’s very misleading!

So, after my last post about my health, I have some thoughts on another topic as well, but I figured it deserved its own post.

My TSH level right now is a 2.03. It’s very good. It’s considered in the “normal” range. My endo dr. was pleased with it, and said to keep taking the 88 mcg of Synthroid. I was very excited, as you may recall, because I can TTC with that number (after being told to stop TTC with my high TSH level of 8). But I had made a decision after receiving that 2, that I should probably wait one more blood test, just to be sure it’s still a 2, or lower. That was back when I thought I could get a blood test soon. My endo dr. didn’t have me scheduled for another blood test until January – and I definitely couldn’t wait that long. After a few back-and-forth calls, she decided I could get another blood test at the end of November. That wasn’t a magic time – just the time she decided on. I wasn’t pleased with that, I was basically begging for one sooner. Here’s the thing: I called her, and my primary dr., and my gyno, and they all said the same thing: Synthroid takes 6-8 weeks to show what it’s going to do to your TSH levels. Getting a blood test once a month wouldn’t show my true levels. Fine. I understand that. But it’s been over 8 weeks since I was put on that last dosage of 88mcg. I have been tested since that time, and had a TSH level of 2. I want to TTC!!!! So, last week I called my gyno. She’s so nice and understanding, and my favorite of the three doctors. She said, in a perfect world, everyone TTC would have a TSH level of around 1. But, she said, 2 is good enough. Good enough!!! My heart seriously jumped. But of course I always have to push it! I asked if she were me, what she would do. She said, “I guess I’d probably wait one more blood test -just to be sure.” And my heart dropped again. That’s the Thanksgiving blood test.

So it’s been a depressing week, given all that info. See, now my levels are great, and I haven’t been told NOT to try at all. My endo dr. (who, when the level was an 8, was so firm in telling me I couldn’t try) said nothing when I mentioned how I had stopped TTC back when the levels were high. Only my gyno, who, after telling me a 2 was good enough, mentioned that I perhaps, could wait.

But here’s the thing: I did a lot of research (shocking, I know), and I couldn’t find a single person who, after getting down to a normal level, continued to wait. When it was a 2 or below, they went for it! And here I am…close to ovulation in the near future. A decision must be made soon. TTC? Or not?

I go back and forth – listen to your doctors, they know.  Except, they never said I couldn’t. They said it looks great, and normal, and good enough. Think about the risks – okay, if my number was higher than a 3, and even worse than that, a 5 or higher, TTC would be very risky business. Most likely, I couldn’t get pregnant at all, and then if I did, I would probably miscarry. So, without this new blood test, I don’t know if my number is still a 2. Okay, I get that. However, even after my Thanksgiving blood test, if that’s still a 2, and I ovulate in December, don’t I STILL not know what my level is? Unless ovulation corresponds exactly with my blood test results, I’ll never know! But I do know how I feel – I feel great. I ditched gluten. I have fewer hives. I’m eating healthy, exercising more. My level was a 2 mid-August. I really don’t think it can be any higher!

One more thing to consider -once I do get pregnant, then monitoring my TSH is easy. My gyno will check it constantly, and adjust the dosage as needed. The first 10-12 weeks of pregnancy are most critical for the thyroid to be normal. It’s just the getting pregnant that’s the issue.

And lastly – I probably wouldn’t even get pregnant this cycle anyway! I have a short LP (9 days) and it will probably require further medical attention in the future (progesterone treatments). My cycles are still way too long (41 days) and I have a low BBT (usually between 96.8 and 97.2)  That said, I just want to try. Just to see. Just to have control over myself. Just because it seems ridiculous to wait 2 more months (and 2 more cycles..I won’t even be able to try until mid-December), just to “make sure” I’m still around a 2.

So I think I’ve made my decision, but I still feel like I’m committing a crime. What do you think?

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