22 weeks, weight gain and “tough” decisions

Today is 22 weeks and every Saturday, I’m just glad to have made it another week. Bug and Goat, as they’ve been determined to be called, continue to cook away. I feel lots of movement with both of them, though I still relate it to gas bubbles. It seems like most people, when they first feel movement, are in awe of the feeling. To me,  they feel familiar. I suppose that means prior to being pregnant I’ve had a lot of gas…

My husband has been able to feel it a couple of times, but usually when there’s all types of bubbling going on in there, as soon as his hand finds my stomach, it stops. Isn’t that just the way. In addition, for the first time a few days ago when I was by myself, I actually watched my stomach move without having to touch it. So that is cool.

I’ve been feeling large, which is fine with me. It probably has a lot to do with the heaviness of my stomach, as I’ve talked about before. When I recline or sit back, my stomach feels like a heavy set of bricks, threatening to crush me and limit my breathing. When I stand up, it feels like it’s going to fall off and I need to hold on to it. In those moments, the only position is sitting straight up. We got brand-new, comfy couches you can sink into – and those aren’t helping at the moment. So I sit propped up with a pillow.

But interestingly enough, those who see me every day view me as “small”. I think it’s a compliment, as apparently pregnant women don’t want to be called “big”. Someone who is not normally in my building found out I was pregnant the other day, and when I ran into her in the bathroom, she said, “I had no idea you were pregnant – you can’t tell at all!” She wasn’t being polite, she was genuinely shocked. Um, really?

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What does that look like, then? I just ate a Big Mac? To her defense, I was wearing a black sweater – I guess that can be deceiving if you’re not looking at me from the side. But still.

See, carrying twins, I don’t want to be small. I want to be appropriately large, because I want appropriately large, healthy babies. I’d rather look like an elephant and have twins with healthy birth weights, rather than be small. I wasn’t thinking I was looking small, until a few people said I did.

This all leads me to weight gain. Prior to being pregnant, with a few years of thyroid problems, fertility drugs and an inability to motivate myself, I gained probably 10-15 pounds. Yuck. Still within the “normal” BMI, but not where I wanted to be to feel good. Then, when the nausea kicked in big-time at 5 and a half weeks, I lost 7 pounds. So, once the weight started to go back on, I considered that my starting point.

One of the things I see recommended a lot for those carrying multiples is to gain a lot of weight. That seems to be the number one most important thing you can do. 24 pounds by 24 weeks, or something like that. Well, I was doing okay. A week ago at 21 weeks, I had gained 15 pounds. Not quite there but on my way. Then over the weekend, I got the stomach bug. (Sidebar – I’ve now had one of the worst head colds in memory and a very unpleasant stomach bug. Do pregnant people get sick more often?) I lost 5 pounds. At this point, I was at a 10 pound weight gain overall, at 21 weeks. So far I’ve gained a few of those pounds back.

So overall, let’s say in 22 weeks, I’ve gained 13-14 pounds. I feel like I should be gaining more weight, and I know that the best way to do that is to eat! Aren’t pregnant women supposed to be all-day feeding machines? You know, an appetite of a 10-year old boy? Well, it’s really not that way.

In fact, the bigger I get, the less I can eat in one sitting, because nothing fits in there. If I shove too much in, I pay for it later with heartburn and discomfort. The late night snack that is recommended? Can’t do it – too close to bedtime, resulting in….heartburn. So I’m not eating that much, really. Not to mention, I need to make sure some of what I eat everyday is produce to…help with digestion. I’m certainly not going to gain weight from my daily apple, banana, pear, and cantaloupe. So it’s a bit of a struggle – I need lots of fruits and veggies, but they don’t help me gain weight. I’m always full after my main meals, and I don’t want a nighttime snack. This is a weird position to be in, for sure.

These thoughts are similar to what I was thinking about last week, with overdoing it at work. I look “small”, and I’ve recently put WAY too much on my plate job-wise, and I come home and again think, I’m doing too much. But it doesn’t look that way at the time, while at work, because I’m in the zone and doing my thing. I don’t know how to “take it down a notch” as an elementary school teacher. I feel like the only way I could is with a doctor’s order. Otherwise, in the moment, I’m doing my job.

Finally, recently I’ve been struggling with decisions that could only be put into the category of “pregnant women problems”. Are they really problems? Not really. But they’re there. We had made some decisions – names, colors, certain things for the registry. And in the past week, we’re questioning EVERYTHING. We’re back to the drawing board on names – we still like the ideas we had, but I think we’ve said them so many times that they’re losing their effect – making us wonder if they’re the right names at all. The same goes for nursery ideas, colors, etc. We do know we’re going with a nice yellow color for the walls, which is different from our original mint green. It’s a cornsilk yellow. The furniture will be cherry, so kind of dark, making the other main color dark brown. Earthy, which is fine. But yellow and brown? Do I need to be thinking about decorations, adding more colors, etc? Do I need a theme? Like, jungle animals or something? I’m not really a theme type of person, at least not for a child’s room.

It doesn’t matter what I’m talking about – I can’t make a decision on anything all of a sudden. It’s like when you go into a Yankee Candle store – after the 20th scent, your nose goes numb and that’s it, you’re done. It’s frustrating. I know we have time, but I want the decisions made because I can then do things with the decisions that make me happy. But in reflection, these “problems” are pretty good to have. Last fall, I couldn’t have imagined even getting to this point.

As a side note, here are some new pictures of Riley and Sadie. Before Bug and Goat arrive, these dogs (who wake up promptly at 6:00 am, no matter what time they go to bed) are my babies.

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13 thoughts on “22 weeks, weight gain and “tough” decisions

  1. thefamilyvan says:

    I hear you loud and clear on the “small” front. Any other time in a woman’s life, that’s all she wants to hear. Carrying twins, though, please don’t ever tell me I look small! I was at a wedding last weekend, and I had a bunch of people tell me they were twice as big as me at 5 months. They meant it as a compliment but…ugh. Not a compliment.

    I say we just take those comments to mean we’re just all baby. No extraneous weight gain in other places. I’m a week behind you, and your bump is a bit bigger than mine, so I say we’re just fine! (It’s also adorable, by the way!)

    Do you plan on finishing the school year?

    Also, I just had a friend send me a great book called Baby Bargains. It might help with some decisions–once you’re ready to make them!

    Keep the updates coming!

    • futuresoccermom says:

      Agreed! I suppose I will do the same, translate the comment into, you’re just carrying it all in the front. That said, I’m not sure anyone is going to call me small now anymore. I….do plan on finishing the school year, but I wouldn’t be surprised if June ends up being a few days in school, a few days out. I don’t know how I’m going to do it with field trips and graduation ceremonies! What about you? Yes – I read Baby Bargains cover to cover and chose a lot of items out of that book!

  2. arbrefleur says:

    Ah! Your puppies are so adorable! I’m sorry to hear about getting sick – that’s no fun! And yes, I think it is fairly common for pg women to get sick more often. (great.) For the record, I’m no doc, but I think you’re doing perfectly fine on both weight gain and activity level! I am your same week, carrying a singleton, and hardly even showing! I, too, lost weight during the icky sickness of the first trimester, but was already a solid 10lbs heavier than usual when I got pg due to the IVF crapola, so I netted out at the end of the first tri. I think a lot of it can be genetic. My mom also didn’t show until almost 6 months with me. Maybe you are the same, naturally a little bit smaller but absolutely nothing to worry about. Babies will take what they need, I promise you! That being said, treat yourself to some ice cream young lady – you deserve it!

  3. Not-So-Fertile Girl says:

    I’m just going to plan on starting every comment I write on your posts with “Ditto” and “Amen.” :-p

    I’ve also experienced people telling me that I don’t look like I’m carrying twins and that I look great “for carrying twins.” It actually irritated me when someone told me I wasn’t that big. As an infertile, I want to be big! Every little millimeter that belly protrudes out fills me with happiness and relief. I’m not actually small, but people’s perceptions are different without the knowledge, I guess. Plus, my gargantuan preggo boobs are making it look like my belly is as far out I think! At 23 weeks, I was measuring 27, which they said was normal b/c of the twins.

    I was concerned for awhile about my lack of weight gain because I have also read in tons of places the advice about gaining a lot of weight during twin pregnancies. However, I just haven’t, and it doesn’t seem to matter what I’m eating. I went for months still throwing up everyday, even on medication. I’ve only gained 9 pounds from my pre-pregnancy weight, and I’m 25 weeks today. (Well, it was 9 pounds a week ago). But 5 of those 9, I’ve only put on in the last 3 weeks or so. The babies have starting putting on ounces a lot faster in that time, though, so it makes sense. For the 1st 22 weeks or so, I’d only gained 4 pounds, and it really used to worry me! However, each time we go in for an ultrasound, the girls are doing fine, and the doctor says their weight is right on point, so I’ve talked myself into that being enough. As long as they are fine, I’m not going to worry too much about putting on a magic number of pounds. Like you though, between the extreme sickness for the first part and the fact that there is NO ROOM in belly, I just can’t eat that much. It makes me really uncomfortable, short of breath, and kicks in the heartburn.

  4. Sunny says:

    Look at that belly!! Your are DEFINITELY pregnant, my friend 🙂

    My weight gain was pretty slow from 0-22 weeks, and over the last month it has ramped up significantly–to a point I’m actually getting nervous about it! However, I know it’s good for the baby, as long as I’m still continuing to get my veggies and fruits and not in danger of gestational diabetes. I’m be NO MEANS a nutrition expert, and I don’t know if you drink milk or milk products, but full fat yogurt, shakes with peanut butter and bananas…ice cream? I know some of the full fat stuff may not be stuff you eat on a regular basis, but liquid fat and protein may be easier to digest, and may help with weight gain? It sure has helped with mine! (cue: eating ice cream from the tub at 3AM)

    On the decorating front, I am also really not a decorating expert, but I JUST went through a nursery decorating obsessive phase. I started off thinking I might be a theme girl, and then when I decided on a ladybug theme (reds, and deep pinks, shit loads of ladybug decals all over the place) it all felt cheesy and wrong. I am going more the color route now–I think? I found crib bedding I loved which has bold/modern flowers and colors–girlie without being too in your face princess or hearts, and have now pulled colors from that bedspread to incorporate into a rug and some drapes. In order to go with the color route, I would find either a bedding set or a rug you like first. Build the color of the wall paint around that–not the other way around. You may find an amazing yellow or brown inspired crib set that has other colors you can pull out of it that would make for a beautiful color on your walls. Babybedding.com and Rosenberryrooms.com are good places to start looking for bedding inspiration! I’ve also had a ton of luck with wall decals from Etsy.

  5. Krista says:

    Never been pregnant with twins, but I would say just keep doing what your doing as far as the weight gain goes. As long as your doctor is not sounding concerned, then you shouldn’t be either. And as long as I’ve known you, I’ve never seen you starve yourself (and I do mean that in the most loving way, lol!). So, those babies will take what they need from you. Don’t start eating food with high calorie fat content, just because you feel like you’re not matching what the books or internet says or god forbid, because idiots out there blurt out the most insanely ridiculous things. You certainly want to gain weight, but you want it to be healthy baby weight and not just a ton of extra fat. Because for one, as those babies continue to grow, it will be harder to carry around them AND the extra fat, and two, that fat is damn hard to lose once those babies come out. Trust me! It gets harder and harder to find room for food, so when you eat, make it count. That apple, banana or pear is going to be a lot better for you and the baby then some of the other stuff that’s out there.
    P.S. love the doggie pics. Hope to see you soon!!!!

    • futuresoccermom says:

      Thanks for the great advice, as always, friend! I laughed out loud about the eating comment, because you are so right. Meals have always been very important. And snacks. I’m guessing the pounds just kind of put themselves on? Yes – let’s get together soon!

  6. robin says:

    I also didn’t want to be called small. At some point I definitely stopped getting that comment, though. At 34 weeks I was measuring 42cm, so like someone who was 42 weeks pregnant. YEP! Nobody was calling me small by the end!

    Just do what you can. I ate a lot and got the heartburn. I was popping tums like it was my job. I figured I should just eat and take the tums, since the tums also comes with extra calcium for those baby bones. I ate a lot of frozen yogurt, too (probably every night – it was summer). I mostly ate healthy but I did eat a lot of frozen yogurt… It was fat free and, again, calcium, right? Some of it was live culture frozen yogurt, that is good for you, right? And a glass of chocolate milk for breakfast every day… which I miss… but it isn’t good for losing the weight after to keep having frozen yogurt and chocolate milk every day.

    Anyway, I ate. And popped the tums. And at 34 weeks I had two babies that were close to 5lb each and didn’t need any medical interventions other than the c-section. Don’t pressure yourself too much, eat small meals many times a day, and do what you can. ❤

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