Sick

This is going to sound like complaining, and I don’t want to give the wrong impression. But really, I guess I am complaining. There’s a big difference between complaining and wishing a pregnancy away. I’m not wishing anything away and I never would. Deep down I am truly thrilled to be pregnant but it’s very hard to concentrate on that now, with how I feel. I’m just simply saying:

I have never felt this sick in my life.

This is not occasional bouts of slight nausea that crackers can fix. This is round-the-clock, 24/7 extreme nausea that has knocked me off my feet and rendered me dysfunctional, and it hit all of a sudden last Wednesday night, at 5 and a half weeks.

And it is extremely frustrating. It’s a good thing it is the weekend and I’m on school vacation, because I never could go to work like this in a million years. Multiple times today I’ve just been rocking back and forth, nibbling on one Rice Krispie at a time. I can barely swallow them. I can’t sleep when I feel this bad. I’ve been 5 seconds from throwing up, but somehow I’ve held it off. I just know that throwing up once won’t do the trick. I’ll be on the bathroom floor all night. I can’t drive far, I can’t do any chores around the house. It’s like the worst stomach bug I’ve ever had (and I’ve had it plenty), but 24/7 for now the 4th day straight. And each day it’s worse, and I can’t imagine feeling any sicker and then I do.

I feel a little weird talking about this here, and I certainly don’t want to offend anyone. It is just the outlet I need when I want to talk about something, and right now, this is all I’ve got.

So, at 10:00 tonight, my husband called the nurse on call and she got me a prescription for Zofran. I am the last person to ask for drugs for anything, but I am absolutely desperate and will do anything to bring this nausea down a few levels. I have a feeling it will be getting worse. My amazing husband who has been at my beck and call all day and laid with me, pressing the “buttons” on my sea-bands (which don’t even touch this, by the way) is on his way to CVS now. I am very appreciative of his help but we both know this is going to get old real quick.

I know part of the problem at the moment is my empty stomach but I just can’t eat anything. Nothing wants to be in my mouth, including mints, crackers, and dry cereal. It’s bad. I do have other stomach problems and have all day, and I learned that my prenatal takes the nausea to a new level.

I don’t know anything about Zofran, except that it isn’t covered by insurance, but I am in need of a miracle. This just feels like the most unbearable thing, that I must say I’m too weak, both physically and mentally, to endure for 10 more weeks.